off from work: 2010

Thursday, December 30, 2010

holiday blizzard

AX first snow turned out to be a holiday blizzard. The last blizzard I could remember was when I was in 8th grade--the blizzard of 1996. This recent blizzard is just hell--Damn you Bloomberg! No one plowed the streets, but the main roads only! And they blocked each end of our street with snow, well, mostly all the streets were blocked. Bloomberg only plowed Manhattan where the rich are. He was on live television, talking about doing his best to clean up the streets, even trying to read in Spanish. If only I could find it in youtube.

My hubby took pictures (12/26/2010)

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

i was a stem cell donor

My eldest sister who is 32 years old right now was diagnosed of Hodgkin's Lymphoma last year (2009). She was having signs and symptoms late of 2008. First, she was complaining of back pain for awhile that it was hard for her to sleep at night, then later on she started to have lumps around her neck area and later on she found a lump on her groin, and what my mother and other two sisters, and I also noticed of her losing weight. She went to get checked (diagnostics) and they did a biopsy on her lumps and it was confirmed she had cancer. What we found shocking and disbelief was that she was in Stage IV.
She went to Memorial Sloan Kettering for treatment. The plan was to do chemotherapy for six months and see the chance of recovery. After six months my sister's lumps had disappeared, we thought "Thank you GOD our prayers had been heard", but that only lasted for a month, the lumps came back again! I cannot speak for my sister, but I remember of her telling me of feeling tired, frustrated, sad and feeling of giving up. We kept telling her to be strong and have patience and be hopeful and also to believe in miracles. We pointed out to her our father as an example.

My father on his 56th birthday (7/26/2009)-
we share the same birthday

My father had a history of kidney failure he was suffering from it since 1992 until 2006 when he finally had kidney transplant. Year 2009 was a test and a trial for us as a family. That August my father underwent for abdominal surgery (Downstate). The surgery wasn't successful, he was in the hospital for almost a month on life support. We saw him deteriorating, but even that I was still hoping for a miracle, I remember bargaining and promising to HIM.It was then my mother asked us if she should sign the DNR, we looked at how his quality of life would be in the future if we still keep him on the vent- no voice(from tracheostomy), no legs (he developed gangrene on his lower extremities), no stomach. It was really hard to decide this because my father couldn't speak--he tried to but he ended up getting frustrated because we couldn't understand him, his eyes were open, but his hands were too swollen to write. We know he was in pain and that he was tired we see it in his eyes. We talked to him and stuff, the only thing I forgot to mention to my father was that, I was the only match for my Ate (big sister), and a potential donor. My father passed away September 25, 2009 RIP. It felt like he is somewhere else like on a long vacation, but when I go back to the day I did his eulogy and whenever I see his name on the headstone, that's when I swallow everything and accept that he is gone.

I'm not sure if my sister had her treatment yet (inset).

I made her one of Amira's godmother.

Enough about that different sad story of my life. My Ate was not really sure about the stem cells transplant because of its effectiveness. She was telling us about it even if she gets the transplant it is not guaranteed that it's going to cure her. We just told her to hope for the best and to think positive. It was last year I did the peripheral stem cell collection procedure. The procedure took one and a half day instead of two days because I produced enough stem cells for my sister's transplant from the injections (Neupogen) that I have to get. Before the whole procedure, I actually had to get a central line (Hickman) because I have poor veins on my arms. When I had the procedure, I was having muscle twitching due to hypocalcemia -which is expected in this kind of procedure, and I was feeling a little queasy and cold also. One of the nurses gave me Tums and asked my husband to get ice cream or a slice of pizza for me. And also the nurse kinda slowed down the Apheresis? machine, so my symptoms won't get worst. All in all it was not bad, it's just that you have to sit or lay in one place for 3-4 hours for the collection. I think the only worst part was when they took out my central line and that was it.

Myself and Ate (11/27/10)

My sister today is doing well (Thanks the LORD), still on lots of meds (anti rejection). She could manage driving from NJ to NYC. She would tell me that we are twin sisters.

Monday, December 20, 2010

i'm a mother...

I have been off from work since middle of August 2010, on my 37th week of pregnancy. I planned to for work another week, but it was too much for me; I've been going to two weekly visits to the perinatal clinic since July! See, I work night shifts (8pm-8am) and I do not have a driver's license (yet), and my husband works in the morning (7am-3pm), and some of those visits I have been taking two buses and it takes almost two hours to get to the clinic!

Now why do I visit twice a week? I was diagnosed with DVT in 2008, I was on Coumadin for a year (I stopped AMA). When I was pregnant I was on Lovenox injections once a day up until my 36th week, my doctor put me on Heparin injections twice a day. I was considered a “high risk” pregnancy, and they did two tests every visit –NST and BPP.

It was just last July I was admitted to the hospital (Maimonides) for one day because my baby was tachycardic (my husband was stressing me that day, and I told my doctor about that). My obgyn was really concerned and she wanted to rule out everything. That time it was my 34th week of pregnancy, I was really scared, I was not ready to have my baby out yet.

On my 39th week of pregnancy (August 17th), I went to the clinic for my usual screening, my baby was tachycardic again. That's when one of the doctors told me that I should just get myself admitted to the hospital for induction. I was glad my husband was with me at that time. We went home, I took a shower, got all my hospital stuff/bag, and I told my mother what was happening. When we arrived at the hospital--alongside my mother (I didn't really want her to be there because she worries too much! Especially that it was exactly last year (8/17/09) my father admitted himself to a hospital for an unsuccessful surgery. RIP) admission was quick; I was glad my obgyn was on call that day! My husband actually told me when my obgyn saw him she actually asked him if he did something that aggravated my baby's heartrate. I thought that was funny. I was happy that I had a good nurse that day, and she was around my age because she had to do enema on me--she told me my obgyn prefers to have her patients to have enema! I can still remember the feeling of the warm liquid that filled inside me. So, after I emptied out, my doctor explained to me the plan while I was there; fetal monitor (baby was on and off tachycardic), induce me first with Cervidil and see how far I am after twelve hours, and then start me with Pitocin, and if I want epidural just to let my nurse know.

Twelve hours had passed, a male doctor came in my room around 2am and told me he is going to take the string out from the Cervidil and do a VE (hated the feeling and thinking of it!) I was like maybe only 1.5cm. While the MD was doing this, my husband was sound asleep a few feet away from my bed--unbelievable!--he was just snoring away. It was funny that I actually asked the nurse (a different one) if it is possible to do number two again even after enema, and she said no, because that's how I was feeling the whole time since I had everything taken out!

Morning came, new staff, I have a new nurse with me with a good preceptor (I thought). My obgyn came, did another VE, no progress still even with Pitocin. I did not feel any contractions, but the nurse said I have been having mild ones. They keep asking me if I want Epidural, and I told them not yet. I think the nurse felt like I was annoyed when they asked me about Epidural because she started explaining to me why it's better to have now before strong contractions come, and how it's up to me if I want one.
Later that afternoon, while my nurse was preparing my abx (I was GBS+), I felt a gushed of water under my sheets and I said this exact thing, "Uhm, I think my water broke". My nurse asked me if I want a male or female doctor because they going to do a VE again, (my baby was tachycardic since that morning, and I was actually on oxygen via mask since then), I told her I want a female. It took awhile for my nurse to come back, looking for that female practitioner. The lady was worried how my baby was tachycardic, asking questions if I have a temperature, etc. She suggested to put an internal monitor because it is more accurate, when she put the monitor in more water gushed out! So she did that while she did the VE (still no progress even after they have been increasing the Pitocin I think every 30 minutes). After all this, I decided to get the Epidural. I think I was having contractions when they were doing the procedure. I was having pain on my upper abdominal area, and I told my nurse and she told me to keep steady and be calm, at this time I was praying for my life. When they finally got me on the Epidural, I feel the numbing feeling instantly, they asked me to reposition myself to keep supine for awhile, but then my baby became bradycardic, it was the nurse preceptor that was with me this time she told me to lay on my left side, one of the student MD with the anesthesiology team told her I have to be on my back, the nurse just took authority, told me to breathe deeply and out while lying on my left side, all the other doctors rushed and came by my bedside--I think that caused an alarm. For two good minutes, my baby's heartrate went up. My obgyn was there did a VE (no progress), baby still tachycardic. That's when she told me they are going to do c-section stat due to failure to progress, she inserted a urinary catheter, and wow the Epidural is amazing!

They rolled me in the OR, feeling all drugged up, put me on the table, more drugged up. My husband was with me asking if im okay, hear the doctors talking while cutting me open. I heard my doctor with worried voice "Tight cord around the neck", I became worried and then I heard my baby cry! I thought I was going to wait longer to hear her cry after my doctor have said that, but my baby cried--strongly. I think I cried too when I heard her cry. Her name's initials are A.X., born August 18, 2010 at 2:28pm.

Here is a video of AX when she was few minutes old.

I stayed in the hospital for three days, I thought it would be longer because Amira became jaundice 24 hours after birth, and her bili level was up. They had to put her under phototherapy. The pediatrician told me it could be due from her cephalhematoma (A.X.was big 8lbs and 2oz, she was probably stuck in my pelvis for a long time), I thought maybe because I didn't have much breastmilk or her feeding was not enough, but she was passing urine and stool adequately.

Having a c-section the day after and few days later is tough! Pain on the incision site and gas pains! And when you are going home make sure whoever is driving you to take a route where there are no potholes! In Brooklyn we have them everywhere.

Looking back....

First few days...